Choosing joy is a gift we can give ourselves and our loved ones this holiday season. One of the most difficult things for a Christian is learning the difference between happiness and joy. Happiness is an emotional state affected by temporal things. Joy is a fruit of the Holy Spirit that should be evident in the life of every believer. Our joy is in our Savior. Learning the difference, and taking some practical steps find contentment in every situation will enable us to choose joy this holiday season. In fact, they can make a big difference in our walk with the Lord every day of the year.
In John 16:22, Jesus said, “I will see you again and you will rejoice, and no one will take away your joy.” What would it look like to possess such contentment and peace of mind that no one and nothing could steal your joy?
Choosing Joy When Your Heart is Breaking
The holidays are difficult for many people. Decorating, celebrating, acting happy and excited are hard when your heart is broken. In 1995, when my kids were 9 and 11, my dad was struck by lightning and killed instantly. One day my son said, “Mom, we can’t have Christmas this year because we don’t have Grandpa.” I sat there a minute, thinking—praying actually. Because one of the things I wanted to teach my kids through that difficult season was that as Christians, we grieve not as the world grieves. We have the hope of seeing Grandpa again.
The answer that came to me was this: “Of course we can have Christmas because Christmas is the celebration of Jesus’ birth. Because Jesus came to earth, lived as a man, and died for our sins, we have the promise that we’ll see Grandpa again in heaven someday. Sometimes we will feel sad because we miss him, but we will celebrate Christmas because Jesus is the reason for our hope.” That decision to celebrate Christmas was the first step toward choosing joy in spite of our circumstances.
Contentment Leads to Joy
On Good Friday this year, a bomb dropped on my husband and me. Life changed in an instant, for our family, and it will never be the same again. I have experienced a whole host of emotions. However, I’ve also discovered that the only person with the power to steal my joy is me, when I allow circumstances to make me forget the source of that joy.
To be joyful you must first be content. When I allow circumstances to steal my joy, I refuse the very
method God has chosen to grow and mature me. If I believe that God is good, then the things he allows into my life, even when they are hard, will eventually lead to good in my life, and in my walk with him. Think about it, Jesus’ death appeared to be the ultimate tragedy until Easter came.
Choosing Joy in Every Circumstance
What would choosing joy in every circumstance. look like? James 1:2-4 says, “Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.” That means death, bankruptcy, a broken pipe in the kitchen, a disagreement with a co-worker, a car accident, or a hang nail–all contain within them reasons to be thankful, to discover the goodness of God—to choose joy.
True contentment comes in acknowledging that every circumstance of life is under God’s control. If I truly trust and believe God, I should never complain or imagine myself in any other set of circumstances except where he has placed me. I shouldn’t compare myself with others. Nor should I wish things had happened differently or be concerned about the future, because he holds it all in his hands. God has placed me right where I need to be in order to become more like him.
Paul wrote, “ Not that I was ever in need, for I have learned how to be content with whatever I have. I know how to live on almost nothing or with everything. I have learned the secret of living in every situation, whether it is with a full stomach or empty, with plenty or little. For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength.” (Philippians 4:11-13 NLT)
Acceptance with Joy
Recently, I reread a little allegory called Hind’s Feet in High Places by Hannah Hurnard. It’s one of my go-to books for an attitude adjustment in trying times. The story of little Much-Afraid and her journey to the High Places always speaks to my heart. Along the way, she discovers that holding onto her guides named Sorrow and Suffering with both hands, prevents her enemies, Fear, Bitterness, Self-pity, Envy, Pride, and others from attacking her. I have allowed the same enemies to get to me, as well.
Much-Afraid is required to take the Shepherd’s promises and offer them as burnt offerings. Each sacrifice is accompanied by a lesson:
- Acceptance-with-Joy –I am to accept with joy all the Lord allows to happen, sacrificing my will to his.
- Bearing-in-Love – I am to forgive others without bitterness. When I do, God can bring good from evil.
- God doesn’t see me as I am now. He sees me as I will someday be, and treats me with love and grace because I am his child.
- When the actions of others hurt me, I must forgive completely.
Giving Thanks Chases Our Fears Away
Part of choosing joy is thanksgiving. I must thank God for who he is and what he’s done, even in the midst of disappointment. When I praise, those nasty enemies, Fear, Bitterness, Self-pity, Envy, and Pride, and others, can’t torment me anymore. Enemies disappear when I sing praise to God.
Trusting God means I believe he works all things together for the good of those who love him, who are called according to his purpose. (Romans 8:28-29) Because in all things I am more than a conqueror. The act of choosing to trust God with our circumstances, then choosing joy, brings about a change of heart. Soon, I begin to feel joy, trust, and hope.
Conquering Our Circumstances Through Joy
Do you ever imagine the absolute worst thing that could possibly happen, and then dwell on it? Allowing my fears to grow out of all proportion steals my appetite, my sleep, and my peace of mind. I walk in fear and trembling where no reason to fear exists. David wrote, “Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil.” (Psalm 23:4 KJV)
Whatever threatens to steal your joy, remember the words of Philippians 4:4-7, “Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”
To allow circumstances to steal my joy, and to allow it to affect my treatment of others is a sin. Paul says, “Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you.” (Philippians 4:8, 9)
This year, in spite of my circumstances, I determine to choose joy. I am a child of the King of Kings. Rather than allowing my circumstances to conquer me, I choose to conquer them through joy. I hope you’ll join me.
What a wonderful response to your son about Christmas. I am praying for you and yours.
Thank you, Diana! God is faithful!
Norma,
This is a powerful, touching and transparent message. I was sailing along agreeing with everything you were saying. I too love hinds Feet in High Places and often think back to it at points in my journey. But when I read your words, “I should never complain or imagine myself in any other set of circumstances except where he has placed me.”– Holy Spirit put his finger on my heart and whispered, “There, right there, guard your heart from this.” That you for being an instrument Papa used to speak to me today.
God bless you, Diana! I appreciate you letting me know. I was certainly convicted while writing it.