All claimed they’d seen him. Alive. Walking, talking. Women and men. Some even claimed to have seen tombs; others, the dead of old walking in the city. But Thomas would have none of it.
“Unless I see the nail marks in his hands and put my finger where the nails were, and put my hand into his side, I will not believe.” (John 20:25)
Keeping in Step, Week One: Patience
At first, this may seem like complete unbelief. And it’s close, but not there; there is a seed of faith in Thomas’ words. The Greek word apistos is described as “unbelieving, faithless, unfaithful”—as in “believing-not, not full of faith, having less faith than required for the moment.”
And who of us hasn’t fallen into that category from time to time?
A week went by. A week where others may have encountered the risen Lord but not Thomas.
Then Jesus showed up again, and the first thing he did was turn to Thomas and offer him exactly what he’d demanded—proof. Thomas set the terms for belief, and Jesus agreed to his terms.
“Put your finger here,” Jesus said. “See my hands. Reach out your hand and put it into my side. Stop doubting and believe.” (John 20:27)
There it is. Doubt, not rejection. A need for more proof, not a declaration of the impossibility that the dead could—and had—risen.
Our focus is often on Thomas, on us, our response. Or on the response of those we’re trying to convince or witness to. To those hard-headed reprobates and members of cults who weave the name of Jesus into their religious pitch, but deny His deity and position in the Trinity.
And yet here the Lord Jesus shows up in a specific room, for a specific man, with a specific answer to a specific demand.
And this is not and will not be the last time Jesus does this before He ascends to take his seat in heaven to await the glory of His final coming. To the two on the road to Emmaus: to Peter on the beach. With patience, Jesus explains, teaches, and restores those whose “little faith” needs a little more proof, compassion, coaxing.
What Is Love?
In Paul’s letter to the church in Corinth, he lists the attributes of love. Paul starts with patience. Perhaps Paul begins with patience because Christ was so patient with Paul.
Over the next few weeks, we’re going to walk through the qualities of love Paul lists in 1 Corinthians 13, but we can jump ahead of this study by simply changing the word “love” to “Jesus.” The New Testament is rich with examples of how Jesus, the Son of God—of God whose core nature is love—interacted with others. Here are a few examples of how Jesus was patient with those you and I might have written off as lost souls no longer worth the effort.
Patience Gives Faith Space to Grow
Nicodemus came at night. A respected religious leader, sneaking a meeting in the dark so no one would see him talking to Jesus. When Jesus started talking about being born again, for Nicodemus the logic didn’t track. “How can a grown man enter his mother’s womb a second time?” Jesus came at it in a different way—and Nicodemus remained befuddled. But Jesus didn’t write the man off. He simply left him with a new thought to consider. Later Nicodemus helps carry Jesus’ body to a new tomb. That’s faith in something: at the very least, faith that Jesus deserved respect.
And Jesus honored Nicodemus by giving him the space to come… in time.
Trivial Matters Often Reveal a Heart That’s Seeking
The woman at the well kept moving the conversation wherever it was safest. Back to theology, to doctrinal questions about worship (which mountain—today its music, dress, congregational size). She shifted their chat to anything but her. When Jesus finally named the thing she was avoiding, he did so to open a door. He named enough of her past and waited to see if her heart, her conscience, would convict.
Paul warns us to avoid foolish controversies, arguments, and quarrels about the law because they are unprofitable and worthless (Titus 3:9). An obsession with trivial matters in Scripture often reveals a heart that’s seeking answers to important concerns.
Patience sticks to the main thing: turning to Jesus for salvation and the fullness of life in Him now.
Faith Grows in Small Steps
Jesus told the Twelve to feed five thousand people. Jesus had eyes to see, and He saw what the Twelve saw: too much demand for too little supply. And still He says, “You give them something to eat.”
His directive carried a deeper meaning. The name of God is always associated with His nature. In the Old Testament, one of His names is Jehovah Jireh, the Lord provides. Jesus had recently given them His authority, His power, His nature. Later he tells them, “Freely you have received, freely give” (Matthew 10:8). They missed their moment. He took care of the crowd and returned to spoon-feeding spiritual acts that grew their faith.
It’s fine to open with a big expectation for a miracle, but Jesus shows how faith grows in small steps. Be patient with those whose faith may not yet match yours. Don’t cast them off. Rather, bring them along and allow them to see and share in your faith.
Patience Lets Conviction Do the Work
They dragged the woman before religious leaders and demanded Jesus give His interpretation of the Law. Judgment or mercy. Death or life. Jesus didn’t answer: not right away. He looked down, looked away from her nakedness, her shame. He wrote something—we don’t know what—at His feet.
Patience doesn’t argue with those whose minds are made up. It’s pointless. Hard hearts, guided by hard heads, need softening before they can receive truth. Let silence have its way. Let the Holy Spirit work on their hearts. Conviction is the Spirit’s job. If a word is demanded, give a word that points to the heart of the accuser, not the one awaiting judgment.
With patience, let mercy fall. Only then will correction find soft soil in a heart.
“No” Is Not Always the Final Answer
A Canaanite woman came begging Jesus to heal her daughter. He answered, “Not now.” At least that’s how the passage seems to read. But later would not do. She wanted help now, not later. She pressed Jesus, saying, “Even the (we) dogs eat (will take) crumbs.”
Jesus called her faith great. We might never know the quality of her faith had Jesus simply moved on. Instead, He seems to have lingered at least long enough to give her space to draw near.
Patience doesn’t write someone off. Patience waits. Patience watches their reaction. Listen to what others say. In their response, you may hear faith speaking.
Patience Provides Time for Others to Accept Truth
A rich man came running, knelt in front of Jesus, and asked what he had to do to inherit eternal life. Jesus looked at the man with love, then told him to remove the one thing that was holding him back from the fullness of life today, tomorrow, and forever.
Patience doesn’t dilute the truth to make it easier to accept. Sometimes the patience we give is time enough to let truth take root: for someone to grow into the calling they’ve heard.
We don’t know if the young man came back; we only know he walked away sad. And sorrow, true spiritual sorrow, can turn a heart back to truth.
Patience Avoids Judgement and Shame
Jesus asked Peter, James, and John to stay awake with him for one hour while he prayed. They fell asleep: and more than once. Sleep robbed them of the opportunity to spend their final hours serving the Lord, listening to His prayer to the Father.
Notice what’s missing from the end of this encounter. No judgment. No rebuke. No shame. Simply, “Let’s go.” Patience leaves the past behind and moves forward.
Patience Reaches Down and Pulls Up
Peter denied knowing Jesus three times before a rooster crowed, exactly as Jesus had told him he would. After the resurrection, on a beach with the smell of a charcoal fire reminding Peter of something he wished to forget, Jesus invited Peter and the others to join Him for breakfast. No mention of the denial. Simply a question: “Do you love me?” And when Peter could not meet the level of love Jesus was asking, Jesus met Peter at his level of love: fellowship. Friendship. Companionship.
Patience doesn’t demand that others meet our standard of spirituality. Patience reaches down to their level and pulls them up.
Patience Serves—Let Others Lecture, Teach, and Preach
When the disciples argued about who among them was the greatest, Jesus didn’t lecture them on humility. He showed what greatness looked like. He served them.
Patience corrects by demonstrating. If pride is the issue, wait on the person. Humility in another may be the mirror we need to clearly see the pride we wear.
Patience Serves All—Especially Our Enemies
Judas was about to betray Him. Jesus knew it and still washed his feet, shared an evening meal, and called Judas his “friend” moments before being arrested.
Patience knows others have hurt us and may hurt us again, and still pulls them close. Not for the sake of destruction, but salvation: at the very least, for saving the relationship.
Patience Doesn’t Need the Last Word
Facing one false charge after another, Jesus mostly stayed quiet. Pilate marveled at it. Here was a man on trial for his life, refusing to mount a single defense. Jesus had truth on His side. He had confidence in the outcome.
Patience can look like silence when really it is our best defense. Saying nothing, refusing to engage, letting the calm of the Father steady your heart may not change the next few moments, but it will preserve your strength and keep your spirit steady for the trials ahead.
The Lord Jesus is the final word. In times when the Holy Spirit tells you to keep silent, let Him have the final say over your situation.
Patience Is Tested When Tired—And Stands, Anyway
Jesus had just learned that John the Baptist—a relative and the one who baptized him—had been beheaded. Jesus got into a boat and went looking for a quiet place, alone, to grieve. The crowds found Him. Rather than sitting with his sorrow, Jesus had compassion on them and spent the day teaching and healing. They didn’t know His pain, but He knew theirs.
Showing patience will drain us. Often, that’s the exact moment when some will try our patience. In those moments, draw upon the Lord; ask the Father. Keep going in His strength. There will be time enough tomorrow for sorrow. The compassion you show today may be the one act that brings another into His kingdom.
The next time you’re tempted to pray, “Lord give me more patience,” pray instead, “Lord, give me your patience.” His patience is perfect for every situation.
Love is patient.
God is love.
Jesus’ patience is yours. Ask and walk in it.