Sometimes when I walk through hard things, I have a picture in my mind of what I’m learning and how I’m growing. Sometimes I can even see a path clear through to the end. Other times I feel stuck, and the picture moving forward is fuzzy. At those times, it’s often difficult to arrange the thoughts floating through my head.
I felt that way between tumor detection and cancer diagnosis, but I’ve felt that way other times in my life too. When something changes that’s beyond my control. When it still feels like everything should be as it always was, but I know the trajectory has changed, and I’m stuck in some weird space between a before and an after, a yesterday and a tomorrow, having no idea when after or tomorrow will come. When all I can do is just wake up and get out of bed and do the things that God has placed in my path for that day, waiting and hoping for a time when I’m comfortably living in the after.
God never leaves me in those tough times. In fact, he always gently (albeit sometimes more slowly than I’d prefer) moves me into a better place.
Anyone else out there get stuck sometimes?
I wrote this poem for those in-between times.
The Space Between
By: Kim Harms
Hidden from view
Unable to move
To see my way through
Stuck in the space
Between old and new
Distorts what’s true
Fix my Heavy heart