The Space Between (sometimes moving forward seems impossible)

Photo by Kim Harms

Sometimes when I walk through hard things, I have a picture in my mind of what I’m learning and how I’m growing. Sometimes I can even see a path clear through to the end. Other times I feel stuck, and the picture moving forward is fuzzy. At those times, it’s often difficult to arrange the thoughts floating through my head.

I felt that way between tumor detection and cancer diagnosis, but I’ve felt that way other times in my life too. When something changes that’s beyond my control. When it still feels like everything should be as it always was, but I know the trajectory has changed, and I’m  stuck in some weird space between a before and an after, a yesterday and a tomorrow, having no idea when after or tomorrow will come. When all I can do is just wake up and get out of bed and do the things that God has placed in my path for that day, waiting and hoping for a time when I’m comfortably living in the after.

God never leaves me in those tough times. In fact, he always gently (albeit sometimes more slowly than I’d prefer) moves me into a better place.

Anyone else out there get stuck sometimes?

I wrote this poem for those in-between times.

The Space Between

 By: Kim Harms

Mind screaming

Lips silent

Heavy heart

Hidden from view

World spinning

Body static

Unable to move

To see my way through

 *

Everything’s changed

Nothing’s changed

Stuck in the space

Between old and new

 *

Resounding gong

Clanging symbol

Relentless noise

Distorts what’s true

 *

God Infinite

God Immutable

Fix my Heavy heart

on you.

Kim Harms

Kim Harms is a writer and speaker who is represented by Literary Agent Karen Neumair of Credo Communications. She is under contract with Familius Publishing for her first book, tentatively titled Life Reconstructed. Harms has a degree in English: Literary Studies from Iowa State University and was a regular contributor at the former Today's Christian Woman. She underwent a bilateral mastectomy and reconstruction surgeries in 2016 after being diagnosed with breast cancer and writes about her Life Reconstructed at kimharms.net. Central Iowa is home, and she lives there with her husband Corey and their 3 ever-growing man-children.

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