“Ahoy, crew! Today we continue discussing how Skipper’s Scripture be the food we need fer the body and soul and the one thing every Christian must do ter sail true. But first, a ter tickle yer dead men’s bones is funny.
Q: Why did Calico Jack do chin-ups on a spreader?
A: Ter improve his arrrrms!
Q: Why didn’t Israel’s hands rinse off before walking the plank?
A: Because later he was going ter wash up on shore.
Q: How come the crew of Queen Anne’s Revenge never played cards?
A: Because Blackbeard was standing on the deck.
“Gather ‘round ladies and lads, and pay attention. And fer those who can’t pay attention or choose not ter pay no mind, mark my words: later there’ll be the devil ter pay.
“It hath come ter the attention of Quimby, our quartermaster, that some of ye hath not been pulling yer weight—and in some cases—yer britches up. Why, I dare say some of ye have a wee bit of a tan line where the sun ought never ter shine. So hear this: going forward, this crew’ll straighten up, hitch up, or else ye’ll be strung up on the yardarm.
“Those be harsh words, sir, and not likely ter encourage the crew.”
“Clap yer trap, Whitecap Wendy, or ye’ll be scrubbing barnacles off the keel with yer teeth. Now, then, let’s unpack our spiritual meal and share out the grub. The Son spoke truth ter the devil when He reminded that snake that we live on every word of Skipper. Every word, not some. Not a few words, but all. Praying and fasting of grub can be an act of worship, but we never be called ter fast of Skipper’s Word.
“Thank, ye, fer that thundering silence.”
“Yer welcome, sir.”
“That were sarcasm, Connie of Conch Beach. Now where was I?”
“Tan line where the sun ought never ter shines, sir.”
“Ah, yes, light. Skipper’s Scripture be a lamp ter our feet and a light off our bow (Psalm 119:105). Without Skip’s words, we drift aimlessly as when in the doldrums, tossed by every wind and wave (Ephesians 4:14). “Sail not by the seat of yer britches,” says wise prophets. “Instead, trust in Skipper with all yer heart. In all yer ways submit ter him, and He’ll plot yer course true“ (Proverbs 3:5-6).
“Just as a watchman in the crow’s nest spots danger ahead, Skipper’s Holy Spirit of Truth guides ye into how ye should go. He speaks only what he hears from Skipper. He’ll tell ye what’s below the horizon and yet ter come (John 16:13). Skipper makes known the beginning of a passage ter the end what is still to come (Isaiah 46:9-10). Old Pete wrote: “We have the prophetic message as something completely reliable, and you will do well to pay attention to it, as to a light shining in a dark place, until the day dawns and the morning star rises in your hearts” (2 Peter 1:19 ).
“So, whether we stand at the helm or cling to the mast in rough seas, we can trust that Skipper’s Scripture ter guide us.
“But guide us where, sir? Ter port? Ter a prize loaded with riches?”
“Aye, great question, Two-Shot Tim. Skipper’s Scripture be perfect. It restores our soul, and don’t ye know we all need ter have our souls refreshed, revived, and rerigged. Skip’s words be sure, making the simple wise in His ways. His precepts—principles, teachings, instructions—be right, giving joy ter our hearts. All His words be pure, giving light ter the eyes (Psalm 19:7-8).
“Well if Skipper’s Scripture be as good as ye say, how come conditions aboard this vessel be so dismal?”
“Could be we have our sights fixed own self, Sea-Sick Steve, and not on Skipper’s true purpose fer the passage. The Son went about doing good ter all so that be our charge as well.
“Skipper calls us ter seek justice fer all, show kindness ter all, and be humble before Him (Micah 6:8). He created us in the Son fer good works, not ill. He prepared our days with tasks so we might work with Him ter show His goodness ter all (Ephesians 2:10). As part of Skip’s crew, we be commanded ter heal the sick, raise the dead, reach out and embrace those shunned by others, and cast out demons. Freely Skipper gives us His Spirit, His faith, His power, and authority ter do good works. Freely, we ought ter give ter others (Matthew 10:8).
“Proclaiming the goodness of Skipper and His kingdom goes hand in pocket with bringing healing ter those in need and hope ter the lost destined fer the Lake of Fire (Luke 9:2, 10:9).
“Caring fer others be at the heart of our calling. We be commanded ter feed the hungry, give drink ter the thirsty, and welcome strangers (Matthew 25:35).
“When we share out the grub, we be commanded ter invite the poor, the crippled, the lame, and the blind. Do this and ye’ll be blessed (Luke 14:13-14).
“Clothe the naked, visit the sick, and care fer those in the brig. We are ter remember those who be mistreated and do all we can ter right the wrongs (Matthew 25:36, Hebrews 13:3).
“Our charge be ter look after orphans and widows (James 1:27) and seek justice fer’em. Rebuke their oppressors. Call out injustice when ye see it. Defend the orphan and plead the case of the widow (Isaiah 1:17).
“Such commands be not mere suggestions, but our charge as crew. As we follow His Word, the Son, we bring His love and help ter those in need.”
“But sir, ye promised ter tell us of the one command we must do ter sail true, not a whole book full.”
“What can I say, Salty Selma. I lied. Lying be a thing pirates’ll do from time ter time. That be why we need a savior like the Son ter pluck us up from the deep of Davy Jones’ Locker when we drift from Skipper’s will. Ye thought this voyage be a leisurely cruise. Nay! We be commanded ter hold a course that aligns with His will—a heading that be good, right, and worthy of true crew (Romans 12:2). We be instructed ter instruct those who’ll listen ter follow His Code and course (Matthew 28:19-20).
“This be the lay of things: whatever task we set our hands, let it all be done in the name of the Son, giving thanks ter the Father who commands the seas (Colossians 3:17). If we’ll do as the Son done when he walked the earth and water, we’ll align with the purpose of Skipper’s words and sail true, ye may lay ter that.
“Now, man yer stations! Hoist the mainsail. Trim the jib! Batten down the hatches. Reef the topsails, and all that rot! Today we sail fer Skipper’s glory of die trying!”
