Rest and Presence

Jonny Diaz gets us. He knows the human struggle with rest and presence.

In the opening of his song, Breathe, Jonny paints a frenetic picture of a rushed morning and feeling behind before the day even gets started. Thankfully, he doesn’t leave us there. He reminds us of God’s peace, if we’ll just slow down enough to breathe.

The song reminds me of Sabbath rest – something God created for our benefit. We read in Exodus 20:8-11 that God commands rest, but how often do we actually slow down enough to truly rest?

What Even is Rest?

Rest is multifaceted. The author of Sacred Rest, Dr. Saundra Dalton-Smith’s work on the seven types of rest explains that rest isn’t just physical and mental. There’s also emotional, social, spiritual, creative and sensory rest (you can learn your rest deficit here). It wasn’t until I studied Dr. Dalton-Smith’s work that I really began to understand the paradox:

When we push through for the sake of productivity, we can actually endanger the quantity and quality of how we serve others. We also endanger ourselves. Life gets chaotic, and before we know it, the frenetic pace has become our normal. Anxiety becomes expected and stress tanks our health.

Is your mind racing with all the thoughts at ninety-miles an hour?

A Wake Up Call for Rest and Presence

I was recently driving to a Christmas party for our writers fellowship. My thoughts raced, as they often do, when I was yanked back to the present and out of the chaotic reverie. As much as I wanted to be at the party, there I was, worrying about taking the time to go during the busiest season of working at a church. All I could think about was getting back to my work to-do list, then getting home to tackle the home to-do list while the other list continued to haunt me with its unfinished business.

Another group gathering that evening. A large community event I needed to get more volunteers for. Had I ordered enough supplies for the Christmas Eve cocoa and cookies for the church services? I needed to make more pumpkin rolls for our family event that weekend. I still hadn’t wrapped the presents. At least the artificial tree was up and fluffed. At least it’s pre-lit, I still didn’t have it decorated!

Oh, and I’d just had a biopsy, so all those possibilities were also roiling around in my mind.

I crested the final hill of a beautiful drive through the country, one I should have been enjoying, when I passed a cemetery and caught sight of a man holding a bouquet of flowers over a grave.

My internal monologue ceased and all I could think about was how this man must feel. How many moments did he wish he could have back to do over and be more present?

The Paradox Continues

And that’s when the paradox really hit home. We didn’t have the results yet, and I was scared. I entered the Christmas party with my mind now on one thing: I needed to be present and I needed to rest in that presence. I needed to stop worrying about producing and let God fill me through this moment of rest in the presence of many sisters who, though they didn’t yet know about the biopsy, would give me spiritual rest just through their presence.

When I got back to work, the minefield of anxious thoughts seemed to have dissipated.

When I got home that evening, I continued to notice a shift. I was still able to be more present, and any of you who know me know the miracle of this considering my ADHD brain at this hormonal stage of life is off the charts!

You can breathe – thankfully the biopsy results came back as benign. However, the days from the test being ordered until I got the results seemed to stretch out forever. Time slowed down. My thoughts turned to those our family had unexpectedly lost and the mark they had left in our lives. My perspective was turned upside down and inside out, emphasized even more by the sight of the man holding flowers over the grave of a deceased loved one.

To best serve others, we must be present. To be present, we must receive rest.

More being, less doing.

Just breathe.

What type(s) of rest will you choose to nourish your body, mind and soul?