A Wonderful Kind of Exhaustion – How Living Authentically Can Keep Your Energy from Being Drained

A wonderful kind of exhaustion? Are you kidding me?

I hear you, but I beg you to hear me out. It is possible to go from being drained to a wonderful kind of exhaustion.

We are roughly a week into the new year. It’s a time when many of us consider what we need to change in our lives. Often it’s a question of how we can be physically healthier. I’m more curious about the state of your soul, because your soul health is interconnected with your physical, mental and emotional health. Boost any one of these, and there are ripple effects in the other areas.

Be honest. How is it with your soul? Are you drained at the end of the day, so exhausted that you wake up in the morning as though you haven’t slept at all? Or are you exhausted from knowing you lived authentically, sleeping with a contented and restorative sleep?

That, my friends, is the wonderful kind of exhaustion we are meant to experience.

What is Authentic Living (or What is it Not)?

Dear children, let us not love with words or speech but with actions and in truth.

1 John 3:18

We live most authentically when the things we do flow naturally from how we are each uniquely created. Or, as I like to put it, when our doing flows from our being.

We have a mental health crisis in our world. A world full of people who don’t know their inherent worth. A world full of comparison. We focus on wanting to be like someone else and are blind to the masterpiece God has created within us.

I so wanted to be musically inclined. I wanted to sing, to play an instrument, to read music. Alas, it was not meant to be. My fingers may flow naturally across a computer keyboard, but for some crazy reason that doesn’t translate to playing an instrument.

And I can’t carry a tune to save my life!

But when joining others in song, if they’re loud enough, I’ll belt it out like nobody’s business, while hoping I don’t get lost in the timing of the song and be heard above the others.

Oh yeah, that’s happened.

When I first heard modern worship music, I was mesmerized. It resonated with my soul. Maybe it’s because I’m a child of the 80’s hair bands and God knew that’s what it would take. Tone deaf or not, when I sing that style of worship music, God still hears a joyful noise.

I would watch and listen to the band, singing along, yet wondering why I couldn’t truly express my worship through music.

God had other plans.

The Benefit of Authentic Living – A Wonderful Kind of Exhaustion

Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will. Romans 12:2

The transformation began several years ago when I was in a modern worship service. Once again looking upon the band and secretly coveting their talent, I was struck with the understanding that my striving was in vain. Wish as I might, my brain just isn’t wired for music.

But my brain is wired for encouraging and shepherding others. Just ask my friends who tell me I am the mama hen to everyone. And it is wired for having faith, even when hope seems to be lost.

I was living into encouragement, shepherding and faith, without even knowing they were my spiritual gifts. But I wasn’t living fully into them in an authentic way, because I didn’t know these were gifts to be explored and embraced. In fact, because I didn’t understand these gifts, in some ways I became the target for harsh words and, at times, bullying.

How much more authentically we can live if we know, explore and understand our gifts and how they play into the way we are uniquely created! The day I learned these were spiritual gifts bestowed upon me when I was created completely transformed my mindset. Instead of hanging my head low and slumping at a taunt or harsh word, I held my head high and laid claim to what I knew to be true.

My spiritual health was healing. This led the way to healing in so many other ways. My mental health began to rebound as I gained a Godly confidence. God wants us to live authentically, just as we are designed. My emotional health began to heal as the words stung less and I learned to reframe my past in light of this discovery. Even my physical health improved, because my energy fueled this wonderful kind of exhaustion at the end of the day.

The Unexpected Blessings of Authentic Living

I’m a child of the 80’s. If you watched The A-Team, you may recall what Hannibal says at the end of every episode. With a cigar in hand and a huge grin, “I love it when a plan comes together.”

I think he got that line from God.

Part of my journey of living into my authenticity was a certification program in Women’s Ministry. During my time in this program, I developed close friendships with many of the women in my cohort. We often prayed together, even through our group discussion posts. It was in one of those posts that I wrote a prayer, asking in part, “Lord teach me how to best love this person while I learn to be more open and understanding of how they are a unique reflection of You.”

The next thing I knew, one of my newfound friends asked me if I would allow her to turn this prayer into a song, Reflection of You, and if I would join her in the copyright!

Amazing things can happen when we let go of our white-knuckled grip on what we covet and allow our doing to flow from our authentic being. By being true to how I am created, God gave me the unexpected gift and blessing of music after all. 

Dear friend, where are you striving against the grain in ways that leave you drained? In this new year, will you join me in the journey to live authentically, so you can lay your head down at night with that wonderful kind of exhaustion?